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This week marked the return to school for all the little kiddies of central Pennsylvania.  Suddenly, our morning commute has become infinitely more interesting with yellow school buses plying the streets again and crossing guards at seemingly every corner.  But, one thing I have noticed about myself as the kids return is how much I’m starting to sound like that old man sitting on his porch yelling at the kids to get off his grass.

As a kid, I was often regaled with tales about how much easier we had it than the generations before us.  They had to walk to school.  In the driving rain, howling snow, and burning sun.  Uphill.  Both ways.  In danger of being beset by bandits and grizzly bears with noting but a loose-leaf notebook with which to defend themselves.

And what about the way we dressed!  Well, as a child of the ’80’s I do have to agree with them on that to a point.  Parachute pants?  Members Only jackets?  What were we thinking!  And don’t get me started on jelly bracelets up to the elbow and popped collars.  Seeing pictures of ourselves could prove extremely painful.

But, I digress.

These days I’m sounding almost as bad.  I see kids picked up by the school bus at their own driveway, to the tune of the bus sometimes stopping several times per block, I roll my eyes.  In my head, and occasionally to my wife, I’m complaining that we had to walk for blocks to get to our bus stop and were lucky if a parent could wait with us in inclement weather.  I haven’t added the topographic miracle of hills with upward slopes regardless of direction, but it’s only a matter of time.

And, of course, I look at the fashions and roll my eyes again.  I don’t want to see your underwear.  Where are you going: school or the night club?  And for God’s sake, we learned that popped collars were a bad idea decades ago, get with the program. Damn juvenile delinquents!

Of course, after saying these things, I feel my face wrinkle just a little more, and my eyesight becomes just a tad blurrier.  I hope that one of my friends will warn me if I start showing a propensity for sweaters on hot days and talking about the good ol’ days that were so much better.

But, I swear, the second the word whippersnapper comes out of my mouth I’m hanging it up.

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3 Comments

  1. Silly bands are the jelly bracelets of 2010!

    • So very true.

  2. that they are.


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